getting back on the horse
2005-04-14 & 5:48 a.m.

Yesterday afternoon I had my first possibly date-like social encounter since the break-up. That is, I met a guy for a cup of coffee. We met last Friday at a salsa club, danced, he asked for my number, I managed to reciprocate interest, called him, and yesterday we met at The Market, where I had a much-too-sweet glass of lemonade and some pretty decent conversation with an attractive man�- a possibly-out-of-my-league-because-he�s-so-good-looking man. Is that a little bit of post-relationship insecurity I sense creeping in on me? Anyway, the point is that I made it through and even had a nice time. I�m not sure we have much in common, but I�m not looking for a new relationship, just a chance to get back into my state of social normalcy groove nad maybe someone to hang out with. Anyway, him: former architect and current engineering student from Bolivia and quite the dancer. The conversation: our educational backgrounds, inconsistencies in pan-American culture, immigration, and why I didn�t give him phone number right away (past run-ins with obsessive types lead me to err on the side of caution, if you�re interested). He doesn�t have a knock-out sense of humor, but then, neither do I. I wonder if he�s just been good-looking his whole life and therefore was never obligated to develop his personality into algo destacante , anything special. I suppose that remains to be seen, or not. I guess I�d like to see him again, but it won�t tear me up if I don�t. I�ll probably see him tonight anyway, at the other salsa club where all the cool people go on Thursdays.

My drawn-out point is this: I�m starting to feel emotionally normal again. Certainly, I�m not fooling myself into believing that I�m over it all and that I�ve stopped having moments where I miss him, because I know that will be long in coming. I�m learning to move on, though, to spend time with someone of potential romantic interest without my stomach folding in on itself and without shaking. Baby steps, right?

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